Kew: Third and Final Gallery

Here is another installment in my series of photos from Kew, taken on a day I went up the river from LonCon3 to immerse myself in botany.

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Kew Royal Botanic Gardens: 2nd Gallery

This gallery contains 10 photos.

Continuing my day at Kew back in August 2014, truant from WorldCon, here is a second batch of photos, selected from the 400 or so I took.

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Kew Royal Botanic Gardens – 1st Gallery: Palm House, Waterlilies, Mediterranean Garden

This gallery contains 13 photos.

Kew was one of the highlights of my trip to London last year. I only had one day. It needed three. I took over 400 photos. Some were photos taken for beauty; some for research. Natural history is a great … Continue reading

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Dispatches from the Desk: Books for the Bad Times

A conversation on Ellen Kushner’s Twitter a while ago, to which I had added that one of the reasons for writing was “To do for someone else what someone once did for you in a bad time,” got me thinking about those books we turn to in the bad times, not only the ordinary ‘having a lousy day’ bad times, which just about any book you enjoy can redeem, or the times when the cumulative stresses of life, endurable when they come at you one at a time, gather in a horde to swamp you. It was books for the deep ones I really got thinking about, the ones where the world seems to be falling apart and you have to keep going on, somehow — illness, heartbreak, grief, depression, death — books for the inescapable that must be endured. Why do we return to those particular books? It’s not so simple as seeking mere escape or the comfort of the familiar.

Escape, as I wrote over a decade ago in Quests and Kingdoms, “. . . is important. . . . Escape is not denial of reality, nor an inability to cope with the real world. Healthy escape does not confuse fiction and reality. To remain healthy and balanced, the spirit needs to refresh itself: the mind needs to play, the imagination to stretch. Recreation implies restoration, renewal” (13). I was talking about the accusation that fantasy literature is ‘mere’ escape, but that accusation was levelled against all novels at one time, when poetry was the serious form for literature. Novels were escape, a weakness, a retreat. But retreat is not surrender. It is not a giving up. It can be the only feasible tactical move. Retreat, regroup, gather strength, set out again. It’s likely everyone has particular books that give them that space, that nourishment they need in such a time. It’s hard to define what it is that makes those the right books for the worst of times, though; I suspect a lot of it, when it’s particular books for the very worst, has to do with what that book gave someone the first time they read it (which they might not even have been aware of at the time), and how familiar it is now. It can be a falling back into that place, like turning to an old friend, who will say, ‘Maybe I can’t do anything — but I’m here, even at three in the morning.’ It’s not just one type of book, either — my own reading for seriously bad times has ranged from Tolkien through Ransome, Sutcliff, Farjeon, McKinley, Bujold, Cherryh’s Fortress series and Diana Wynne Jones to Glen Cook and Donald Jack.

I retreated to books a lot as a child, and I had very particular tastes. Fantasy, historical fiction, adventures in other times and places. That was what books were for. They took you away, and away, when you are the weird kid, is good. They also made the world a whole hell of a lot bigger. As a storyteller, a writer, I want to write books that will take readers out of themselves, give them someplace else to be, whether that’s for adventure, contemplation, exploration, or to get away from other things for a while. When I write now, whether for children or adults, I want to give readers emotionally mature or maturing people with integrity — some of them — and passion, and honour — or a notable lack thereof. Both protagonists and antagonists with layers and shadows all the way down. Horizons, with intimations of mountains even out of sight. Forests and darkness and sudden shafts of light. People on the edges of things doing what those in the centre will not or can not. Tragedy hovering, some people who can look at themselves and their world ironically. I want it to be exciting, entertaining, emotionally moving, perilous on both the physical and — let’s metaphorically call it the spiritual — levels for the characters, thought-provoking . . . . Those are all elements of a story that will suit my taste at any time, but for that one person who finds their own shadows in it at a time of need, echoed and acknowledged and perhaps, driven into the light, I can hope that it might be something more.

I wrote the first draft of what would become my first published book, Torrie and the Dragon, during the last summer of my father’s life. He was very ill and it was a time of desperate pretending all round that somehow this was going to get better, papered over knowing it would not. It ended up a light, funny quest story of the kind I would have wanted to read when I was nine; it was shallow, I recognized, shallow, and when (many revisions later) it was published, the enforced short length of a Canadian children’s novel in those days meant that the things I wanted to develop further, I couldn’t. I was not completely happy with it but had moved on to work on other things. But it had shadows of searing loss in it, even if only I could see them, and the things that had comforted me as a lonely child reading — friendship and honour and anger under the surface, distances to be travelled, wilderness, and mountains on the horizon — as well as the things I had sought in my own reading as a young woman facing a parent’s death, which I think were very similar. Then rather more years later I met someone who said they had loved that book as a child (you know you’re getting old when …) and that they had gone back and reread it more than once, found it a place of comfort and retreat during a family member’s final illness. They told me that at a time when I was particularly discouraged, and I just about ended up crying, because of that connection between their return to that first Torrie book* and the period of my life in which I had written it. I’d got something right, offered something that was needed. That mattered.

It’s not the only reason for writing, but it’s one of them.

*A greatly revised and expanded version of that book, which does more of what I had always meant it to do, is still in print today under a slightly different title, Torrie and the Dragonslayers.

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Dispatches from the Desk: A Long and Wandering Road, But Progress

Well, it’s been a while since I posted anything on the blog, and March being the start of a new year (at least it feels that way to me once the snow starts melting and the sap starts running — an important psychological year-mark even though I only own one sugar maple and don’t tap it), be it hereby resolved, I am going to post on the blog more often. I’m aiming for once a month. Go ahead and subscribe by email or the RSS feed thingummy [technical term] to get notifications of posts, if you will, and/or follow me on Twitter. I tend to be on Twitter a lot; it’s my home for virtual Marakander coffee-house socialization and I enjoy it, so why not try to bring some of the same approach to the blog, I said to myself this morning. Rather than feeling guiltily that I need to somehow scrounge time from writing whatever book it is I am presently writing in order to compose a long and thoughtful essay, I’m going to aim for some sort of monthly blog post of news and progress and reflections.

So here I am, and here we are, and what have I been up to lately? Well, The Lady came out in December. It’s the second volume of Marakand, completing the story begun in The Leopard. Marakand can be read as a sequel to Blackdog, or as a standalone, since although the histories are connected, the focus of the two is different. With that out and launched upon the seas of fate (go buy it, go read it, and give it lots of love in reviews . . . I, like every author, beg you — because that really helps), I’ve carried on with my current project, which is another book set in the same world.

How’s it going? Well . . . it’s been a long and wandering road. There was one element of the story, a very difficult psychological journey for a character, that took much thought and revision to get right. I couldn’t seem to get on with the external plot and the main characters’ external struggles, until I (and that one character) had mastered the internal one. You remember the old “themes” we were taught back in elementary school? In those days all stories were labelled as either “man against man”, “man against nature”, or “man against himself”? This one is definitely having two parallel stories happening, and one of them is “man against himself”. Those over-simplified “themes” are found in varying proportions in most stories, but in this case, getting right this story of a man struggling to survive the aftermath of great psychological trauma — shellshock, PTSD . . . in his world they would say he has been wounded in his soul — really dominated my work on this book for many months, to the point where in the end I concentrated on writing that one character’s story (and that of his partner which is necessarily closely entwined with his own and is in fact the warp thread of the book, the spine of the story), while leaving the strands of three other important people and the larger plot of external enemies, civil war, and stuff you’re going to have to wait for the book to learn about, for later.

But now, having finally written that strand of this polyphonic plot to my satisfaction, I am at the stage of going back to write the parallel-and-interwoven external story. “Man against . . .” what was that conversation Ahjvar and Ghu had in The Lady?

“Who are we fighting?”
“You and I? Mostly everyone . . .”

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